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All Deviations

Deliverance part 1 by ~sethrulz:iconsethrulz:





Deliverance.
Part 1. Through the fire and flames


  Nya looked across the large foreground of the temple. A growing crowd was there to honor the death of her father. She turned towards the funeral pyre, and felt a sudden wave of grief as they started the fire that would burn away her fathers body, and the white sangheili next to the pyre started to speak.
      “though his body is gone his memory is not. Even now he is one of the lucky ones who is able to take the great journey. The grand forerunner who hath created us to be there instrument have set in motion plans for us to follow their path. Ando ‘Liwolee is just another martyr on the path of the great journey and as the great ones once said….’’ the rest of his words are lost on her as Nya remembered the day the black armored sangheili came to her door with news of her fathers death….

It had been night when he had shown up. Her mother had opened the door.
They had talked in hushed tones that Nya couldn’t here. If she tried to get closer they stopped talking and shooed her away. After a couple times Nya’s sent her out to do work. But from their conversation she had picked up ‘war’
Which was no surprise since they were at war. ‘human’ who was the species they were at war with she thought. And she heard ‘green shining armor’ along with ‘demon’. what these words meant she didn’t know but she did know that humans killed her father and she wanted revenge. How dare they kill her hero, her mentor, her father! She wanted to kill everyone of them. But sadly she could not join the army because she was female. ‘by the rings’ she thought to herself. ‘why must we abide by these laws!’ she just wanted some way to avenge her fathers death, but her own society was holding her back. She headed into her room and the door hissed shut quietly behind her.

She suddenly came back to the present as the funeral was just finishing up.  Her mother, sister, and brother were heading towards her. “come Nya.” her mother said.
   “yes, dear mother.” Nya looked towards her brother who would be leaving for training within a few days. Suddenly a plan started to form in her mind. She thought of a way to avenge her fathers death. ‘I will have vengeance!’ so on the way back to their spacious home she began to work it out. She was going to lie…to join the army.
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The Door made hardly any noise as it opened. Nya stepped out into the moonlit hallway. She crept as quietly as she could down the corridor towards her brother, Anso’s, room. She opened the door only partially and slipped in. she started to creep in when her brother suddenly yelled out
    “NO!” she stopped dead in her tracks and looked over to him thinking she had been found out. But he was still laying down so he was probably dreaming. She breathed a quick sigh of relief and continued to his storage container. Nya opened it and took out a few sets of clothes. Then she snuck back to her room. Inside she packed the clothes into her bag along with some extra money and a survival knife. She then headed over to her window. She pressed the holographic panel on the side of it and the window eased open. Dropping down as softly as she could to the dense bushes below. Nya began to sprint to the city, not wanting to be caught before she even left. On the way into the city the streets were completely deserted and Nya hoped that the city was like this as well considering the time of day. But she would only be half right. Most of the city was deserted, but as she grew closer to the shipping berths, the area suddenly exploded into activity. The dark night broke into bright shining lights and many creatures. Loud sounds assaulted her ears and she looked around to see a gold armored sangheili yelling orders into a voice amplification device. He turned suddenly in her direction and she dived behind a stack of storage crates. For a few heart pounding moments Nya thought she was going to be found out. But then the soldier walked away to continue his work. Nya started to walk down an alley of containers when she bumped into an Unggoy dock worker that had come around the corner. Without thinking she grabbed the Unggoy by his methane tank and threw him into an open crate and sealed it shut. The young sangheili ran towards the loading gravity lift and stopped about fifty feet from it. she hopped onto a cargo loader when no one was around.
   “Gods protect and forgive me for what I’m about to do” she whispered quietly. The loader began moving towards the grav lift and she felt the familiar pull in her stomach as the loader entered the lift and began the rise into the bowels of the ship. she must have passed out from lack of sleep because the next thing she remembered was waking up and being in a cold dark hold. It was then that she heard it. A loud tapping sound coming from the other side of the hold. She carefully pushed shipping containers away from herself and slipped out into the walkway between crates. She headed in the direction of the noise and eventually found it coming from a crate that somehow seemed… familiar. she reached up to the lock and opened it to find a shaking, cowering, Unggoy. Then realization dawned on her and she remembered the dock worker she had shoved in the crate. The Unggoy tried to run out past her and she grabbed him by his orange tunic. Lifting him up she saw a flash of some sort of gem stone and she grabbed it.
   “now listen here.” She said letting her voice fill with a commanding tone. “do what I say and you’ll get this back. don’t do what I say and I’ll cut your methane tube.” she said with quiet menace as she brandished her survival knife.
    “I do what you say just give back please!” he said with some urgency.
   “Not yet. First you have to get some things for me.” Nya said as calmly as she could. “I want food and water. Get them and I’ll give you back your jewel.”
  “Yes, yes. I get you what you want. I be quick and collect it.” the unngoy ran off into the gloom and Nya knew he’d be back. Unggoy were not quick to part with things they thought were precious to them. Sure enough the Unggoy was back with the food very soon. Though Nya wasn’t sure if you could call it food. It was a gray, gooey substance that looked liked another creature had thrown it up.
   “What is that?” she asked the unngoy.
   “It is food from the food nipple.” he answered. “eat. It good”
  “I’d rather not. Can’t you get sangheili food.?” Nya inquired.
   “Not unless I want to be executed” he replied with a laugh. The small worker held out his hand expectantly.
   “Fine!” she said angrily. She thrust out her hand and gave him his trinket. The Unggoy bolted before Nya could grab him again. The young sangheili girl looked at the food and checked to make sure there was a three day supply. She drank the water but refused to touch the food. It was going to be a long three days.

   Nya couldn’t take it. Two days into the flight she started to eat the food. First it had been slow. She had reached over and took a little bit. Tasting it for a second and she already hated it. She couldn’t even describe how it tasted. It was just horrible. But after eating enough she didn’t even taste it anymore. By the end of the third day she no longer had any water or food since she was use to eating a lot. Suddenly an alarm sounded and she recognized it as a landing alarm. She hightailed it back to the cargo loader she had come in on. Nya dived behind the containers and made herself as comfortable she could, which wasn’t much, for the unloading. She heard workers moved into the bay and start unloading the shipments. Finally they got to her loader and started moving it to the grav lift. When they got there the lift started and she felt the pull again. The loader landed and the workers began moving it to a designated store house. The short journey was slow going and uneventful. Once they were there the workers simply left. She popped out of her hiding spot and looked around the area to make sure it was clear then ran out of the store house and into the bright sunlight. She ducked around the building and into the street market on the other side of the shipping center. She walked into an alleyway and scaled the building. From the roof she could see the temple at the center of the city as well as the surrounding city. Once she found the building she was looking for she got down and headed in its general direction. She passed through the crowded market and into the less crowded separate streets. She passed several sangheili and lots of Unggoy. It took her about fifteen units to find the building she was looking for and another ten to decide what to do. Once she had figured it out she headed towards a close public bath house. Inside she changed into her brothers clothes and walked out. Nya walked into the military recruitment building and hoped her ruse would work.
©2008 ~sethrulz
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Submitted: January 5
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Author's Comments

Well to those of you that know. this is my new story im using as a break so i dont have to wright the lost mission! lol. first id like to thank Tano for doing my editing. id like to thank Sangheiliaine for being part of the three wierdos. id like to thank Bungie for giving uss halo. and please. if you see a problem or a way i could have written it better please tell me.
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Devious Comments

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~Perforex:iconPerforex: Jan 5, 2008, 10:42:13 AM Mood: Joy
There is no CAKE!!!!!!








Great story :)

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Out Of Time
~sethrulz:iconsethrulz: Jan 5, 2008, 12:14:23 PM
thank you!

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WIERD DOMINATION the slogna of the three wierdos.( me, tano, and aine,) support us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~SangheiliAine:iconSangheiliAine: Jan 6, 2008, 4:45:42 AM Mood: Zest
Alright Seth my friend, I see a few things that you could do to help improve your story. Please do not take this in any way, shape, or form as me trying to be hard on you. I am only trying to help. :)

1) Please make this have a few paragraps and then make sure to space them out.
2) When a nes person speaks make sure to start a new paragraph. (need an example? check out Tano's or my stories. Or just ask! :P )
3) Some of your words after a . need to be caps.
4) "the unngoy ran off into the gloom and Nya knew he’d be back. " You need a caps here (look at 3) and you need to change the spelling of Unggoy.
5) A few different things like , ; . and things can be used to change things up.
6) It's okay to use the words 'and' and 'but' to help make your sentences longer.

Again I am only tring to help you and not trying to sound mean or be harsh in anyway. Your have good writtings skills and I only want to see you improve upon them. This story sounds good so far and I can't wait to read part 2. By the way, thanks for putting me in your thank you!! *huggles*

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Zim: "My squeedlyspooch!"

"Weird Domination!" ~The 3 Weridos (Tano, Seth, and myself)

*is flashbanged* "I CAN'T SEE...and can someone answer the phone?"

Meep! ^__^
~sethrulz:iconsethrulz: Jan 6, 2008, 10:17:02 AM
i know i know tano has already told me. its cool. any crituque is wanted!

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WIERD DOMINATION the slogna of the three wierdos.( me, tano, and aine,) support us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~sethrulz:iconsethrulz: Jan 6, 2008, 10:19:06 AM
thank you for the help! ill fix it when i get a chance. :hug: for the help with my stiry my dear wierd friend

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WIERD DOMINATION the slogna of the three wierdos.( me, tano, and aine,) support us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~SangheiliAine:iconSangheiliAine: Jan 6, 2008, 8:35:21 PM
not a problem...just hope i didn't seem as if i was trying to be mean

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Zim: "My squeedlyspooch!"

"Weird Domination!" ~The 3 Weridos (Tano, Seth, and myself)

*is flashbanged* "I CAN'T SEE...and can someone answer the phone?"

Meep! ^__^
~sethrulz:iconsethrulz: Jan 7, 2008, 7:05:36 AM
no no. it good. thank you. srsly

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WIERD DOMINATION the slogna of the three wierdos.( me, tano, and aine,) support us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~SangheiliAine:iconSangheiliAine: Jan 7, 2008, 3:48:32 PM
kk

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Zim: "My squeedlyspooch!"

"Weird Domination!" ~The 3 Weridos (Tano, Seth, and myself)

*is flashbanged* "I CAN'T SEE...and can someone answer the phone?"

Meep! ^__^
~sethrulz:iconsethrulz: Jan 7, 2008, 6:08:49 PM
lol

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WIERD DOMINATION the slogna of the three wierdos.( me, tano, and aine,) support us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!